Old People

I was having lunch with a co-worker yesterday and I walked passed a table of old ladies and noticed something that is pretty much a staple of the majority of old people I know. Why is it that they all must have their State Farm Insurance (or whatever insurance company) calendars with them at all times, and what's more, is that they must write on them with red pen? What is that about? I know it's hard to remember what doctors appointment is which day, but what about a day planner? or maybe a desk calendar? These two old ladies were comparing and contrasting, which is incredibly stereotypical of old people, all of their doctors appointments to find out which day would be appropriate for bridge. Hilarious. I mean, what's next? Are they going to bust out their checkbooks where they place all their receipts, coupons and the like in the cover, tigtened with a rubberband? Or maybe they will go home and rip off the latest month off the mini calendar (which is appropriately placed next to the insurance calendar when hung up) from their local barber/stylist. Or maybe, just maybe, they will bust out their envelope with coupons organized according to expiration date.

Old people are great.

Classic Bum Moment

This morning as I am walking into a 7/11 on Mission Bay Drive, I see a bum out of the corner of my eye chillin outside. I don't think anything of it, of course. Then this happens:

• Bum: Hey you!
• Stinky: [subtle glance]
• Bum: You're a whore!

Probably the funniest thing that happened all day.

Stinky...out

Asshole Neighbor Lady

Dear Fat Whore Next Door:

Thank you for reporting to Animal Services for our dogs barking. I know that it is so terrible that they may bark for 2 minutes out of the day because they see another dog. How could they? It's not like they are dogs or anything. I would also like to thank you for reporting to animal services that they bark every weekday, every weekend, days and nights for more than 30 minutes at a time because that is completely feasible. Nevermind the fact Murphy can't walk a block without being winded, but he sure as hell can bark 24/7. I also find it amazing that the dogs are inside at night and when we are home, and they must still manage to bark. Is that a silent bark, similar to a dog whistle? Because I can't hear it. Can you hear it right now because Murphy is lying next to me asleep? Oh you can? Amazing. Apparently they bark all day during the week too. How would you know? Do you not work during the day like normal people? Oh you work nights? That means you must hear them while you are gone too. That's some killer hearing you have.

Do you report to the City about the firetrucks blaring their sirens driving warp speeds down Ingrahm? Do you report the bums filtering through your trash at 2am because you don't put it in the garage? Do you report the wasted people walking through the alley? How about the Fast and the Furios Tokyo Drift that lives 5 doors down? Ah you don't? Is that because its ridiculous? But reporting a subtle dog bark is really important, fat whore. Oh and your husband/boyfriend Lance is a pussy. Tell him to start sticking up for himself or else the guys across the alley are going to liquid nail your garage door shut.

One last thing....eff off, get a effing life.
Sincerely,
The Lovely Ladies of 1615

The Housewarming...

...was a great success and a great time. Bbqing is always a good choice (thanks Nate for helping us out there) and there is no such thing as a bbq without beer (thanks Berg for providing). Some of the highlights:

• Drinking excessively for 10 hours.
• "The V-Neck"
• Ladies and Gentlemen, our very own, Vincent Chase.
• Coincidently a large amount of Rhode Island people.
• The return of the infamous beer pong table. [My closing skills do still exist; don't believe a word Smellso says.]
• I became a free agent twice in one game.
• Of course the ever so popular Asian Tourist.
• "Since when did you become good at sports?" - Smellso to Scooper in re: her beer pong ability.
• "Why don't you sit down?" - "Because I look too good standing up"
• Vinnie Chase passing out at 10PM
• Group Silver Fox outing.
• Tequila train at 12AM.
• "Did he come all the way over here to tell you you weren't his type?"
• Chili cheese dog on my skirt.
• Waking up and immediately regretting everything I drank, including a 24 of Bud Ice.

Thanks to all of your who attended, it was a good time...and for those of you who didn't...don't worry it will happen again I'm sure.

Pictures soon to come...

K-Fed

For those of you who missed it, Kevin Federline made his debut performance tonight on the Teen Choice Awards (the only reason why I watched it). If you didn't see it, you are probably better off because it was quite possibly the most terrible thing I have seen. I guarantee all FM morning talk shows will be talking about how absolutely terrible this performance was. He had kids break dancing as his opener, the song is called "Lose Control", for an ex-backup dancer, his moves are shit, his nasely sounding rapping ("R&B with a lil bit of Rock and Roll" according to K-Fed) could barely be heard and lastly, Britney introduced him. Can we just talk about her presentation for a minute? She is fat. No question about it. Yes I know she is pregnant and all that jazz, but seriously? And if you are looking like that at this stage in your life, can you please do us a favor and wear something that is more conservative because no one wants to see you ass if you are packing baby and everything else. Gross.

Fight or Flight?

I have come to terms there are a lot of people out there that could be potential "best friends" or "close friends," but to determine which person stands where, you have to figure out which ones you can trust. Trust is an interesting subject because it is something that should stand strong between friends no matter the situation. It is something that makes or breaks a friendship, but when broken it can be rekindled in someone else. It is a characteristic that you believe your closest friends to embrace, but sometimes they show you a different side. Sometimes they show you the person you didn't believe existed and that's when you know that person is not who you thought they were.

It happens to all of us. You live and learn with the people you have grown up, gone to school with, worked with and just randomly met along the way. The people you keep with you are the ones who walk beside you, not in front or behind. These are the important people that keep you together, pick you up when you fall, don't judge you and when you can't figure out for the life of you why you feel the way you do, they explain it to you in the simplest fashion possible. These are the people who fight for your friendship because it means something to them. They want to help you help yourself or have you help them. And it's all because they care. Those are the people you trust, keep close and don't let go.

Most recently, I have realized there are people that you believe to fit this description but when minor, more complicated (almost compromising), or not so positive situations arise, these people choose to not take responsibility for their own actions. They choose to let someone else take the blame because its easier; they don't know what's its like to take ownership. I feel we learned the concept ownership when we were children, for instance when Tommy hit Susie or when Becky pushed Johnny. Or didn't we?

Confrontation. Another component of functioning human life. It happens, you can't escape it. There are going to be situations, whether they be major or minor, that every person has to deal with, you can't run away. Fights are a natural part of existence; they teach your who you are, who your friends are, and bottom line, shows you who cares. Avoiding it just makes it worse. Lying just makes it worse. So why does it happen so often? Because it's an "easy" way out. I hate to break it to those of you who have yet to realize it, but it's not "easier", in fact, it makes its worse. Friendships develop fights, the trust barrier is broken and the situation can evolve into the friendship no longer exisiting. Is that what you want? Is that the positive outcome of you taking the "easy" road? I don't think so.

So I guess it comes down to the easiest question:
Fight or Flight?

Recent News

Two things have been brought to my attention via news:

1. Encinitas is urged to limit laborers, meaning they are trying to get the illegal immigrants to stop loitering around big businesses and major intersections waiting for work. Interesting. www.signonsandiego.com/uniontrib/20060721/news_1mi21workers.html

2. The Las Vegas Review Journal apparently has nothing else to talk about in the daily news if this article is the leading headline. "Don't Sleep Near Feces or Urine" (as if that needs to be reiterated in any way). http://www.reviewjournal.com/lvrj_home/2006/Aug-18-Fri-2006/news/9130007.html

The Chula Vista Experience

The Chula Vista Experience: Week 1

I have spent all week in Chula Vista doing off-premise work stuff and it has been quite interesting. Today, while I was waiting for my sales rep, I was loitering around the "fresh" meat section/butcher shop area of this marketplace. Now I don't know why South Bay markets have the characteristics of Mexico so badly (well I know why, but seriously?), but they definitely do. I am disgustingly staring at these pigs feet when I am interrupted by a butcher man asking me if I need help. This is how it proceeds:

• Butcher Man: Can I help you?
• Stinky: No, I'm just waiting for a co-worker.
• BM: Where do you work?
• Stinky: Budweiser
• BM: You shouldn't work. You look like you come from TV.

This is what I deal with all day long.

Update Time

Totally have been slacking on the blog factor lately because, believe it or not, I have been working a lot and relaxing come the weekend, so Stinky has been preoccupied with other things. Update of what's happened:

1. I got promoted, so that means Stinky is getting up early and being productive throughout the day. Shocker I know.
2. Took a series of Asian Tourist pictures at Qualcomm with T-Rex for the comedy.
3. Saw the Asian Tourist buying 40 disposable cameras mentioned in previous blog.
4. Went to the Happiest Place on Earth and had an amazing time. No fireworks show this go around due to weather conditions, which was rather disheartening.
5. Highlight of the Disney Day: Wanting to take a picture on Minnie Mouse's bed in Toon Town but had to wait because a little Asian Tourist with a fanny pack jumped on the bed before me and threw up the peace sign. Priceless.
6. Working with someone from work whom I have never met before and becoming buddies. Totally awesome, everyone should meet The Midget.
7. Duffy's going away party. I can't even begin to explain what happened. I don't even know. I don't think anyone knows. The pictures can't even explain it.
8. Saturday's adventure at the Tavern. G-Unit and the rest of the ghetto posse showed up, gold chains, grills and all.
9. Leon (huge black guy with gold chains) asking me to dance. Me politely declining and him asking me to give him one reason why. "I'm a generic white girl." Needless to say, he walked away satisfied.
10. Chris' comment to me: "We have a DJ, and a shark dancer, that means you have to be the bootie shaker."
11. Mu-Shu made an appearance at the house Sunday.
12. Daddio's Champagne Breakfast.
13. Berg & Adamitis "work out" together at 7AM and "chat". I don't know what that means.
14. T-Dub wearing a mini skirt that barely covered the ass region and a midriff....to a wedding.
15. T-Dub making an appearance back on the dance floor after almost a year sabbatical. Woo woo...here we come.

Funniest Shit

The man you above my friends is an Asian Tourist. How do I know he is? Because I took this picture this morning as he was buying 40 disposable cameras. Yes 40. I asked.

Addendum to "Threesome" Post

Something was brought to my attention today by one of my cohorts in regards to the two girls/one guy vs. two guys/one girl topic.

Direct Quote: "I'm thinking just one guy. I wouldn't want the butt vajayjay action going on. Or like sex and in the mouth at the same time."

Another Direct Quote: "I would want to be the guest star with a couple, but I would want to be the center of attention."

Threesomes

Threesomes have been the topic of conversation over the past weekend due to the excessive watching of Sex and the City and Entourage. Having never been in a threesome I can't really speak about the subject wholly, however I do think it would be a good time, but within reason I guess. The big questions mostly were: Would you do it with people you know or strangers? Would you do it with your boyfriend/girlfriend and someone else or would you prefer to be the guest star? If you were the guest star, would you like to be prominantly involved or just a side act? Two guys and a girl or two girls and a guy?

Speaking for our household, most of us came to the consensus that we would like to be the guest star involved in said threesome (given none of us were in a relationship) because we wouldn't be attached or have anything to worry about. And by worry about, I mean we don't want a boyfriend involved because there would be sharing and we aren't really down with that. [Sorry guys] The decision on whether or not we would want other people we knew involved didn't really get answered because there were so many options and what have you. There was only one answer to the last question listed above as well, and there would definitely not be any swords crossing. It's just a preference.

What are others opinions?