I'm not 21 anymore....

I not really sure why I get myself into situations where I think I can drink like a 21 year old again.  I'm not in anyway close to being a college kid; I haven't been for years.  So clearly being the stupid girl that I can sometimes be, I thought going out after our Christmas dinner with a few coworkers was a brilliant idea.  

Now, in most circumstances I would say yes, go do that team bonding and have a good time, but when you decide to exceed the fun limit, then I say you should probably go home.  Well I did in fact exceed the fun limit by about 10,000 adult beverages too many.  I am quite proud of myself for maintaining my composure because apparently I was ok enough to get into Typhoon (which apparently we went to, I was not aware of the situation) and get myself home. [yes I'm aware it's unsafe and it was dumb, but I am ok so we can laugh about it now]

Today I am waking up and a few things run through my head.  

1.  Am I late to work yet?

2. Why is my bed completely not made?

3. Why did I sleep in my contacts?

4. How did I get home?

5. Why am I naked?

Now questions 1-3 I could go without worrying about, but 4 & 5, no matter how much I thought about it all day I couldn't figure it out.  I thought my feet would hurt from wearing boots all night but they were fine so I thought I may have cabbed.  But then I saw the socks.  My socks looked like they had been attacked by the asphalt monster, which can only mean I walked home shoeless, which is also safe and exceptionally sanitary.

As for number 5, that continues to be a mystery because I don't know what happened and I was by my lonesome so unless Murphy learns to talk, it's just going to be one of those wonders.

As for excessive beveraging on a work night, I don't recommend it.  I don't feel rad, I sure as hell look like ass and I can only imagine what others may think when they get a good look at this hot mess.