16 year olds dude

I was just present for the most ridiculous thing in the history of the world, and thank you Allison (T-Rex) for bringing me because it was entirely worth it.

T-Rex, after locking her keys in her car ala Stinky, had to go to a going away party for a girl she used to work with and invited me to come along. I agree of course because there is liquor involved and I don't know anyone, so clearly an open forum for excessive amounts of shit talking and "what is this?" Of course I am totally down for this event. I would like to point out the following, and let me tell you, all I can think about the entire time is "would it be appropriate to get out my camera to document this so people believe me" and "am I really here right now".

1. T-Rex's old boss is 38, totally fine. His girlfriend is 18, not so fine.
2. Aforementioned boss has a picture of girlfriend and him at her prom in his apartment.
3. I was among the oldest people there, second in line behind T-Rex and boss.
4. Among the party goers are several 16-18 year olds, all girls. I didn't really know what to
do with that. In fact, I was so confused that it led me to the bottle of tequila, and I hate
tequila.
5. There was a lot of falling over and slurring present among said teens, mind you its only
10PM and in the meantime I am thinking which Law & Order will be on when I get
home.
6. Clearly there is a generation gap because the excessive inebriation stemmed from mass
amounts of Captain Morgan, Maker's Mark, Midori, Almond Champagne, Tequila and
Smirnoff Ice, all one right after another. I believe there were shots of Maker's Mark
taken, which I don't even know how to respond to that.
7. The two most wasted ones (both really young) are holding on to one another, which
then leads to a hard fall over the couch and wasted beverage. The camera would have
been so clutch.
8. Words can't even describe what I witnessed because it just wouldn't do it enough
justice.

T-Rex and I leave and the first words out of her mouth are: "yeah, um, did that just happen?"